How do I do therapy?

(What is it like? What happens?)

This is a common question I’m asked by clients before they start. Doing therapy for the first time can be nerve-wracking, and people can be concerned about doing therapy right or about what will be expected of them.

It can be reassuring to understand and realise that there is no ‘right’ way of doing therapy - that you and the therapist will work together to find a pace and a way of working together that works for you. Having said that I appreciate that this will be unbearably fluffy and vague for some people, but it really does make sense when you get underway.

What therapy is like and what happens depends on the type of therapy you have, and the person you choose as your therapist. I’ll focus on what therapy is like with Basis Therapy Services. I practice transactional analysis, which is a humanistic therapy, where the work is done by the therapist and the client together - and where the focus is on what works for the client. Be ready to give honest, open, and respectful feedback as you

go along, as to what is working and not working; I will ask you on occasion, but don’t feel you need to wait to be asked.

In transactional analysis, the therapeutic relationship is very important, as the ways of being that the client finds difficult, or find no longer work for them, can emerge safely here. If you can find in yourself to tell your therapist that you are experiencing something (frustration, anger, doubt - whatever) in the work we are doing and/or something the therapist has said or done, the therapy is a safe space to explore what that means, to trace it back to its origin, and to practice new ways of being. All without judgment whatsoever.

Each session can be different, and therapy (and your experience of it) feels different depending on where you are in your therapy journey, on what is going on for you in life outside of therapy, and on you bringing experiences, feelings, and thoughts you are having between sessions, into the therapy room - talking about them to understand better how you are with others, and how you want to be in the world.

The short answer is that you won’t be judged, no-one knows how it will go before they start therapy, and there is some comfort in just getting underway. Before you know it, it will become familiar to you and, in many clients’ experience, a place and time you look forward to, where you can focus on you in a safe, non-judgmental space.